Yay! Camping in the snow - mission accomplished!

Got back this afternoon after my tropical camp

Set off Thursday to Anita's Campsite at Banbury. Was a bit worried how busy it would be as other people had attempted to book for this weekend and had been told the site was full

A few pods

Full everywhere (?!)

There was no one there when I arrived so I found a pitch and started getting the tent up before the imminent snow that was forecast. There appeared to be 4 other caravans on the whole of the campsite and no vehicles or humans. Either I had entered the chain saw massacre, or there was no one stupid enough to want to camp on a Feb weekend where the forecast was 'severe weather warnings'

I cleverly pitched near the tap and in the empty top field so I had everything I needed around me (including dog run for them to poop to their hearts content in)

Struggled to find an empty pitch

The tent wasn't looking too inviting when i first pitched it - I did try and scrape up the remaining snow off the floor with a plastic step but it was futile so I gave up

Finally got everything pitched and went off to buy enough provisions to feed a small army in case I was stranded. First off I decided to fill the water bottles. Tried the tap next to me...frozen. And the next tap....frozen....and the next (guess?!) So the only one any good was in the main entrance to the site

Snuggled down and the snow started at 6pm. Went outside about 9pm to take a few pics of the lovely stuff

and was glad I did really. As after I took the shopping out of the car my dementia had kicked in and I had left the back door open when i took the shopping out

Back into my nice cosy tent (the Cabanon Latitude), fan heaters on full blast, dvd loaded, a few beers and settled for the night

Had to make a slight mod to the summer air vent. Somehow I figured it wasn't going to be that stifling hot that I would need a mesh outlet. So I stuffed my towel up there (and it stayed there for 3 days). Washing is highly overrated anyway

Up bright and early the next morning (about 10am), checked outside to see if tents were all ok

Bit saggy in places but pretty good

So undid the zip on the tent and let the kids out....

They were obviously very stressed, and concerned for my well being in these blizzard conditions...

Bundled them in the car and had a drive through Banbury. Obviously had to take a picture of Banbury Cross

The history of it is:-

The Banbury Cross, which is located on a roundabout in the middle of the town, was erected in 1859 to celebrate the wedding of Prince Frederick of Prussia to his bride, the original cross having been pulled down some 250 years earlier.

Pretty crap pressie really as it's just stuck in the middle of the road. Perhaps the original was more impressive. But if anyone does attempt to 'ride a cock horse to Banbury Cross'...watch the traffic

However, I was impressed by the local takeaway (so much so I stopped on double yellow lines to take the picture)

Asked Homer what he fancied doing next?

Nooo! we have just been!

Moving on I decided I would go nosy at Broughton Castle. I had done my homework on this and although it was closed, thought it would be worth a visit. Background on it is that is owned by the 'Fiennes' family, distantly related to Ralph & Joesph Fiennes. Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth I decided to pursue Ralph Fiennes as he is a bit of alright - I think it's the character traits he has that I tend to like in men. They reflect in his acting parts, which include..

Voldemort
(ok not the most flattering...)

Hannibal
(yes yes a mass murderer but look at the body...)

err ok then, he was in the Duchess! (no no he wasn't the nicest in that, I'm sure he was sleeping with someone else in that...)

OK, he might not play the nicest of blokes but his brother was pretty yum in Shakespeare in Love...

So off to Broughton Castle I go, to see if I can bag a Fiennes...

I had to drive down a small snow covered lane to get to the castle (another idiotic idea), I found clunking the brakes and driving diagonally (not by choice) and missing the junction by an inch was pretty hair raising, but a nice test of snow driving

Now this would be a lovely picture of the castle with the surrounding moat and water. Which unfortunately due to me visiting in February, is a picture of a snowy castle with a snow field and a snowy moat

Waiting at a decent distance with binoculars for Ralph to arrive

And the dogs tear arsing round the grounds as usual

Surveying the road back from the castle for my second performance of 'Dancing on Ice inside a Berlingo'

So I took a casual slide back to the campsite

Much the same as last night, beers, a film, large amounts of food and chocolate

Next day I decided I wasn't doing much and asked Homer what he fancied doing...

He's not the most imaginative

But I had been told there was a local walkway running alongside the campsite

Onto the internet to check it out (very good reception surprisingly at the campsite) and found it was the famous 'D'Arcy Dalton Way' (no I have never heard of it either).
It sounded quite romantic, visions of some great Bronte novel had obviously contributed to the name, and it had connotations of unrelinquished love and ghosts rambling over the fields.
Reality was it was named after some old fart in the rambling assocation

First we had to pass the field with horses in, curious little creatures! Homer detested them, but strangely they seemed quite taken with him (probably thought it was some rare vietnamese pot bellied labrador)

My vile dog trying to scare the horses and failing



(The pods in the background are on the campsite)

Was a lovely day for scrunching along

Back to the tent and a well deserved siesta. Much the same as the previous nights, beer, dvd, finish my book on the kindle (enjoyed it 'Dead Simple'. A man is buried in a coffin as a stag night joke, the rest of the stags get killed in a car crash and he is left in the coffin. I like a bit of light reading)
Temperatures dropped a lot tonight, resulting in both my water bottles freezing. This meant a trek to the main loos to try and fill them again. However the tap here was also locked solid. After 10 minutes of trying to catch hot water coming out of the shower head (blummin soaked my coat) I found a washing up facility (bit late but I know its there now)

Went back and second task was to try and get the frozen olive oil out of the bottle. I managed to scrape enough out with a skewer to cook the sausages.

Decided to leave the frozen dishcloth and towel on the table, they had gone rock solid and were like little clingons

Anything else I was trying not to freeze I put in the iceytek (reverse logic from any other time of year)

Next morning was packing up day. Had a visit from some of my camping buddies. Tea and cake and the latest gossip then they were off rambling up some mountain

Packed up within 10 mins of heavens opening and rain coming down

Now stuck in house until March...although I could ask Homer what he fancies doing.....

Sorry mate, not tonight..

Thomas the tank engine, another tent and a guinea pig

After a reckless ebay session I found myself having to collect 2 tents today. Usually this is an exciting and enjoyable prospect. Today it wasn't

The first tent was a Thomas the Tank Engine pop up. No I haven't finally lost the plot, but unfortunately my daughter sharing the same genes has some dumb ideas as well. For a upcoming fancy dress themed 'What I wanted to be when I was young'. She decided she had wanted to be Thomas the Tank Engine

Now costumes are pretty forthcoming for age 3-5 years old, but for 30 year old women they are pretty far between. So a flash of inspiration kicked in when I just happened to be randomly searching for 'tent' on ebay and I decided I could somehow adapt this to make a costume

The woman was slightly horrified when i picked it up and explained I planned to trash little Jimmy's pride and joy.

Once collected I headed North for the even worse ebay tent buy. Having another 'I am sure I will get outbid on this one' I decided to put a tops of £20 ebay bid on what I affectionaly call the 'Shit Hole Tent'. As luck was obviously against me I won the bloody thing.

The naming of this tent wasn't in jest it really is a mess. Ebay usually flatters, but even it couldn't find the right light to show this grease stained, filthy, what are apparently broken inner zips deluxe abode

Ebay Pic 1, not looking so bad from this one angle

But alarm bells ring on pics 2 & 3. With the gaping inner and what appears to be a nice blob of grease on the back of it

So an hour toddle up the motorway and you muse on what state your purchase will be in. Having bought half of the canvas population and equipment I have visited all manner of houses, some lovely huge mansions (always good as nice stuff) some normal, and some not so good.

On arriving there I realised this area was the pits. After passing a few boarded up houses I concluded that perhaps it was a war zone. If Gadaffi hadn't been killed last week, there is a strong possiblilty he would have been hiding on this housing estate

After spending 10 mins in the car hiding everything under dog blankets I approached the house. No knocker/bell etc so a nice gentle tap on the door. On cue a pair of gums drools through the window where a nice friendly camper eating staffie was trying to devour me through the double glazing. A man runs round the gate and lets me straight through the back

He explains the tent has been up all week for the kids to play in. 2 seconds later a chocolate bar with a childs face walks out of the tent (arghhhh choccie fingers everywhere). Thinking a few muddy fingerprints isn't the end of the world (and by this stage I can see the canvas is a lovely tone of grey soot) I proceed to look inside...

I undo the zip and this is staring at me...

Very tame but unfortunately he seems to shite pellets twice as big as his head. Which are all over the tent. Not the worst BUT, he obviously has a taste for inner tents and had eaten some nice tasy holes along the back of the inner

In fairness the owner apologised and said oops he could have ate that any time this week...and did i still want it? Also letting me have it for the knockdown price of £10 rather than the £16.50 I had won it for

Having driven 90 mile I was taking it even if i was just going to ceremoniously burn it when i got back

We took the tent down, which involved the chocolate child crying and asking why it was going (she was probably scared the guinea pig would starve to death) He started to fold it, nice muddy and pig shit side inwards, so I did ask if perhaps we could shake it first to get rid of some of little hammy shitfaces faeces?

Quickest ever taking down of a tent, I ran out the garden and heard chocolate kid shout 'daddy i think there is a hammer for it as well?' - I graciously declined the mallet, as if it had been in my hand I would have squashed the bloody guinea pig into the floor with it

In all its glory, complete with pig shit

Got home, and having the patience of a gnat, have hosed down the inner, and it is now sitting bathing in radox upstairs (OH is at work so oblivious to mass destruction of bathroom). Also went through the pegs and put graveyard pegs to one side. There are actually a few pegs that are quite decent, so I am hoping at valuation I can recoup the £10 ebay fee...

I like to think of this as a project similar to when mechanics buy cars and bikes, and renovate them to their glorious best..I don't hold out much hope for it, but am considering replacing all the canvas with guinea pig skins....

Bank Holiday camping at Uffington near Oxford

Last minute decision and we were booked into Britchcombe near Uffington. Was fun trying to book in, leave about 2 hours for this as it can be a bit painful. Also ignore the sales pitch off the little old lady (actually very frightening little old lady)...and you don't need the flapjacks to supplement her sons uni fees. Or the tomatoes out of her greenhouse. Or want to donate to the save a gorilla fund box.

Anyway we were ordered to a field (there are 4) and left to our own devices to pick a pitch. We couldn't decide on the North side of the Eiger or the South facing Matterhorn, but decided to go to the top of the range as it looked peaceful

We are at the top of this pic on the North ridge (approx 3 miles away from the portaloos)

It appeared to be a lovely quiet pitch, so we set up Harry and Hattie, the hemp tents we had chosen for the 'sh*t little tent meet' (logic is we would never use them as we had much nicer tents. So we forced ourselves to stay in them, altho they resemble something that Postman Pat knocked together)

Barley is easily pleased as long as there is a bed

We took great care choosing the pitch and avoided the right side of the field due to the road. After tents were pitched we realised we had a road plus cattle grid about 10ft away. So every 20 mins there was a loud grinding rattling noise as people drove up to visit the white horse (directly behind us)

Looking down from the hill/road back towards the campsite

One night in Harry Hemp was enough for me, so I had a play with the ebay win of the week, the latitude.

A few bendy poles, throw the canvas on and he's all glamped in his technicolour dream coat

On Saturday we decided to trek up the hill to see the infamous white horse. Not as easy as it sounds, as horse is displayed at v strange angle, facing directly upwards. It was obviously originally designed by a 50ft giant. Having endured the steep walk up, it was compulsory to get a snapshot for the album. So here is his eye (be grateful I haven't bothered with the tail pic, as that is even more boring)

Found a few shortcuts on the way back, so dragged the poor dogs and Annie (camping buddy) as the crow flies.... Except it was lumpy and bumpy and got idea in head that there were adders waiting

Having wasted an extra 20 mins on the shortcut, proceeded to go up and down every crevice. Unfortunately as this meant passing from field to field, had a slight problem with Homer. He doesn't do stiles. Scep (another camping buddy) was hero and picked up my lard arse dog to pass him over.

Yayyy job done!

The only other walking we did was round the cargo shop in Wantage (full of lovely stuff for tent, so spent a couple of quid in here). Then we attacked Sainsburys and bought enough food to feed refugee camp. Speciality that night for Annie was beer can chicken. She stuffed beer can up chickens orifice, wrapped in foil then put on camp fire.

After an hour or so it was done. No meat thermometer was needed, as when the can totally disintegrated we figured it was ready. Is just as well we eat in the dark, as would be scary to see what we are actually putting in our mouths.

Both nights we were overlooking a huge firework display, had brilliant ringside seats and free entertainment. Day of departure the Red Arrows were due for a flyover at 11am. Decamped and waited...and waited...and waited...and gave up and went home

Actually campsite was bargain at £7 a night. May try the Himalaya's next, as have warmed to sleeping in scrunched heap at bottom of slope in inner tent